








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 125 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Premier | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




29 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1151 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,318 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 873 | 26% |
| Smokes | 880 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 810 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 755 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $357,766 of utility $158 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 157 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Raznn #3 | 83% | 6 |
| #2 | NaY | 67% | 6 |
| #3 | polox^ | 60% | 10 |
| #4 | Kyojin | 57% | 7 |
| #5 | Polo l'abricot | 56% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rev♿L Seek TEAM | 10 | 0.0185 |
| #2 | pouet pouet | 5 | 0.0158 |
| #3 | neirdA | 4 | 0.0301 |
| #4 | k. | 3 | 0.0055 |
| #5 | Polo l'abricot | 2 | 0.0057 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rev♿L Seek TEAM | 108 | 0.20 | 3 min |
| #2 | k. | 96 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| #3 | pouet pouet | 64 | 0.20 | 1 min |
| #4 | 威士忌酒 | 44 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| #5 | Polo l'abricot | 41 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rev♿L Seek TEAM | +3.91 | 82 | 61 |
| #2 | k. | +3.53 | 87 | 64 |
| #3 | 威士忌酒 | +2.94 | 87 | 73 |
| #4 | Polo l'abricot | +2.35 | 91 | 50 |
| #5 | Raznn #3 | +1.64 | 88 | 81 |





