








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 667 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 251 matches | ||
| Premier | 132 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 56 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 33 matches | ||
| Faceit | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 16 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6953 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,560 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2365 | 15% |
| Smokes | 3022 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 5490 | 35% |
| Molotovs | 4683 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,678,457 of utility $131 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 502 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KNAVE | 64% | 58 |
| #2 | Gab (YoungPretzel) | 60% | 354 |
| #3 | yonji | 58% | 181 |
| #4 | mike481 | 56% | 64 |
| #5 | Pilon | 49% | 69 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yonji | 49 | 0.0138 |
| #2 | Gab (YoungPretzel) | 23 | 0.0039 |
| #3 | Pilon | 17 | 0.0118 |
| #4 | mike481 | 16 | 0.0119 |
| #5 | KNAVE | 6 | 0.0052 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KNAVE | +3.46 | 82 | 62 |
| #2 | Gab (YoungPretzel) | +2.53 | 83 | 49 |
| #3 | yonji | +2.47 | 82 | 59 |
| #4 | OlmO | +1.60 | 88 | 48 |
| #5 | mike481 | +0.95 | 88 | 59 |





