








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 620 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 449 matches | ||
| Faceit | 73 matches | ||
| Wingman | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 33 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4697 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,748 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4153 | 23% |
| Smokes | 4060 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 4296 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 5239 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,142,211 of utility $159 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 634 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | Mr.PapaSmoke 🦄 | 44% | 109 |
| #9 | TetumTede | 44% | 48 |
| #10 | Louj. | 42% | 97 |
| #11 | Rey | 38% | 40 |
| #12 | Kinder Wayno | 31% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Globalik | 645 | 0.22 | 19 min |
| #2 | Mr.PapaSmoke 🦄 | 239 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #3 | Louj. | 229 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #4 | Elimn8d | 220 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #5 | Kinder Wayno | 167 | 0.22 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fadetoblack | +2.53 | 56 | 56 |
| #2 | Globalik | +0.79 | 46 | 78 |
| #3 | Elimn8d | +0.73 | 54 | 50 |
| #4 | Mr.PapaSmoke 🦄 | +0.39 | 57 | 59 |
| #5 | Columbo Kam | -0.08 | 54 | 60 |





