








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 501 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 41 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Premier | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1677 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,199 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1174 | 28% |
| Smokes | 1051 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 913 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 1061 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $341,463 of utility $140 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 57 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wekfjo | 100% | 8 |
| #2 | proxi | 88% | 8 |
| #3 | sqreet | 71% | 7 |
| #4 | Frip | 70% | 23 |
| #5 | preliden | 68% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Frip | 70% | 23 |
| #5 | preliden | 68% | 22 |
| #6 | Noname | 68% | 53 |
| #7 | yaankz | 67% | 15 |
| #8 | ChipaaN | 65% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | preliden | 3 | 0.0065 |
| #2 | sqreet | 2 | 0.0122 |
| #3 | Noname | 1 | 0.0010 |
| #4 | ChipaaN | 1 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | yaankz | 1 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ChipaaN | 201 | 0.31 | 5 min |
| #2 | Noname | 195 | 0.19 | 5 min |
| #3 | preliden | 69 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #4 | Frip | 60 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #5 | yaankz | 51 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ComputerGeeK* | +5.72 | 93 | 61 |
| #2 | proxi | +4.03 | 90 | 58 |
| #3 | Frip | +1.88 | 95 | 62 |
| #4 | ChipaaN | +1.09 | 91 | 66 |
| #5 | Noname | +0.98 | 90 | 68 |





