








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 480 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 106 matches | ||
| Faceit | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 19 matches | ||
| Wingman | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Renown | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 78 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1864 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,589 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2810 | 24% |
| Smokes | 2555 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 3170 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 3054 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $736,050 of utility $121 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 81 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | stev.v | 68% | 19 |
| #2 | eXe | 56% | 27 |
| #3 | S1rv1v4L | 48% | 31 |
| #4 | Mr_J_Reese | 48% | 44 |
| #5 | SOL1DUDE | 46% | 125 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | cyberaser | 39% | 103 |
| #10 | ✿ Brunhild_ | 38% | 21 |
| #11 | Bama | 37% | 19 |
| #12 | Nidorino | 31% | 16 |
| #13 | boiler_ | 28% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dim8 | 12 | 0.0034 |
| #2 | R0$4 | 3 | 0.0007 |
| #3 | Maschock | 3 | 0.0023 |
| #4 | SOL1DUDE | 2 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | S1rv1v4L | 2 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dim8 | 607 | 0.17 | 17 min |
| #2 | R0$4 | 384 | 0.10 | 12 min |
| #3 | cyberaser | 263 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #4 | SOL1DUDE | 255 | 0.10 | 7 min |
| #5 | boiler_ | 154 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | stev.v | +3.74 | 79 | 71 |
| #2 | SOL1DUDE | +2.69 | 75 | 68 |
| #3 | dim8 | +2.16 | 55 | 75 |
| #4 | ✿ Brunhild_ | +1.33 | 72 | 74 |
| #5 | R0$4 | +0.69 | 72 | 65 |





