








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 199 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 103 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2589 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,374 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2084 | 33% |
| Smokes | 1823 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 948 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 1519 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $618,971 of utility $142 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 27 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SnooZe Airlines | 69% | 13 |
| #2 | Gza | 65% | 26 |
| #3 | Lennon | 63% | 52 |
| #4 | Holocene | 63% | 16 |
| #5 | dimitr1 | 58% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lennon | 252 | 0.24 | 8 min |
| #2 | Gza | 65 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #3 | Holocene | 65 | 0.22 | 1 min |
| #4 | SnooZe Airlines | 37 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #5 | dimitr1 | 6 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lennon | +4.07 | 89 | 69 |
| #2 | ✪ Del Guardiano | +2.36 | 83 | 61 |
| #3 | Holocene | +0.03 | 57 | 70 |
| #4 | Gza | -0.89 | 60 | 67 |
| #5 | SnooZe Airlines | -1.05 | 63 | 57 |





