








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 312 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 183 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 27 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2053 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,499 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3089 | 29% |
| Smokes | 3221 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 2691 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1498 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $716,413 of utility $128 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 39 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | oppi | 53% | 19 |
| #2 | proX | 48% | 23 |
| #3 | 7 | 46% | 167 |
| #4 | servus | 45% | 62 |
| #5 | ♛ larsoN | 44% | 158 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | 7 | 46% | 167 |
| #4 | servus | 45% | 62 |
| #5 | ♛ larsoN | 44% | 158 |
| #6 | |data| | 44% | 164 |
| #7 | RoSch | 38% | 50 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | |data| | 4 | 0.0011 |
| #2 | ♛ larsoN | 4 | 0.0012 |
| #3 | 7 | 3 | 0.0008 |
| #4 | RoSch | 1 | 0.0009 |
| #5 | proX | 1 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | |data| | 462 | 0.13 | 11 min |
| #2 | 7 | 166 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| #3 | ♛ larsoN | 143 | 0.04 | 4 min |
| #4 | RoSch | 73 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #5 | proX | 53 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | proX | +1.28 | 65 | 56 |
| #2 | |data| | +1.01 | 64 | 64 |
| #3 | 7 | +0.92 | 78 | 62 |
| #4 | servus | +0.88 | 72 | 55 |
| #5 | RoSch | -0.49 | 41 | 68 |





