








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 345 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 249 matches | ||
| Wingman | 48 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 51 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3056 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,078 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2860 | 24% |
| Smokes | 3653 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 2514 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 3051 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $908,528 of utility $132 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 286 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 7 | 50% | 228 |
| #2 | proX | 49% | 59 |
| #3 | ♛ larsoN | 47% | 187 |
| #4 | servus | 45% | 85 |
| #5 | RoSch | 44% | 72 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | proX | 49% | 59 |
| #3 | ♛ larsoN | 47% | 187 |
| #4 | servus | 45% | 85 |
| #5 | RoSch | 44% | 72 |
| #6 | VNTA | 44% | 164 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♛ larsoN | 5 | 0.0012 |
| #2 | 7 | 4 | 0.0008 |
| #3 | VNTA | 4 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | proX | 3 | 0.0024 |
| #5 | servus | 2 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | VNTA | 331 | 0.09 | 8 min |
| #2 | 7 | 246 | 0.05 | 5 min |
| #3 | ♛ larsoN | 178 | 0.04 | 4 min |
| #4 | proX | 122 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #5 | RoSch | 81 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | proX | +1.05 | 59 | 64 |
| #2 | |data| | +0.74 | 64 | 62 |
| #3 | 7 | +0.73 | 76 | 62 |
| #4 | servus | +0.07 | 71 | 52 |
| #5 | RoSch | -0.37 | 41 | 66 |





