








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 375 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 139 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Faceit | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 42 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2469 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,453 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2064 | 32% |
| Smokes | 1728 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1902 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 759 | 12% |
Our logs show you have wasted $827,682 of utility $171 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 25 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Peacewalker | 75% | 20 |
| #2 | sttph | 56% | 36 |
| #3 | ZoToX | 52% | 44 |
| #4 | Piou | 49% | 72 |
| #5 | Laser | 49% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Daft | 4 | 0.0032 |
| #2 | 🔥 hyzzen | 4 | 0.0033 |
| #3 | sttph | 4 | 0.0051 |
| #4 | Laser | 3 | 0.0040 |
| #5 | ZoToX | 2 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 🔥 hyzzen | 278 | 0.23 | 6 min |
| #2 | Roro | 197 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #3 | ZoToX | 169 | 0.18 | 5 min |
| #4 | Daft | 115 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #5 | Laser | 108 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [EBP] Zoronoki | +3.87 | 85 | 50 |
| #2 | ZoToX | +3.27 | 79 | 62 |
| #3 | Peacewalker | +3.25 | 85 | 51 |
| #4 | 🔥 hyzzen | +2.78 | 77 | 67 |
| #5 | sttph | +1.78 | 86 | 57 |





