








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 994 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 486 matches | ||
| Faceit | 204 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 66 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 40 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




37 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8044 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 34,139 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8383 | 25% |
| Smokes | 8948 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 9575 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 7233 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,976,481 of utility $107 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 720 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | lukee | 54% | 157 |
| #7 | Kevin Durak | 52% | 265 |
| #8 | ◉◡◉ҠҠHАNA_МÄӀЛЛЛ ◉◡◉ | 51% | 57 |
| #9 | kalevib | 50% | 58 |
| #10 | mnntrl | 48% | 135 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | seessuri | 18 | 0.0022 |
| #2 | Kevin Durak | 10 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | lukee | 10 | 0.0030 |
| #4 | nlw | 5 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | JumaltenjUmala | 2 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | seessuri | 1151 | 0.14 | 27 min |
| #2 | JumaltenjUmala | 937 | 0.18 | 20 min |
| #3 | Kevin Durak | 512 | 0.09 | 12 min |
| #4 | lukee | 479 | 0.14 | 15 min |
| #5 | nlw | 434 | 0.11 | 13 min |





