








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 228 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 293 matches | ||
| Premier | 227 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 9 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Renown | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 26 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6522 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 28,215 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8553 | 30% |
| Smokes | 7881 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 4646 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 7135 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $825,841 of utility $62 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 586 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | jogurt | 52% | 144 |
| #6 | Lanzo | 51% | 120 |
| #7 | Celine Dion | 51% | 65 |
| #8 | AtlieX | 49% | 125 |
| #9 | eMbo | 48% | 60 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Luffy^- Skyjaskokkari | 8 | 0.0014 |
| #2 | Alyssa Edwards | 7 | 0.0012 |
| #3 | Lucy | 5 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | jogurt | 4 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | Celine Dion | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Luffy^- Skyjaskokkari | 749 | 0.13 | 21 min |
| #2 | Alyssa Edwards | 637 | 0.10 | 14 min |
| #3 | AtlieX | 491 | 0.18 | 13 min |
| #4 | jogurt | 223 | 0.07 | 6 min |
| #5 | eMbo | 188 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lucy | +4.01 | 77 | 60 |
| #2 | Celine Dion | +2.75 | 76 | 56 |
| #3 | FH 7h31337n355m0n573r | +0.80 | 49 | 69 |
| #4 | eMbo | +0.39 | 56 | 77 |
| #5 | jogurt | -0.75 | 53 | 58 |





