








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 167 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 89 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
997 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,724 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1089 | 23% |
| Smokes | 1555 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 944 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 1136 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $423,716 of utility $143 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 109 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BIG REMM | 59% | 17 |
| #2 | Armadyl | 52% | 21 |
| #3 | ヌースカイネン | 50% | 18 |
| #4 | Bo$$u. | 48% | 33 |
| #5 | topg | 44% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | topg | 44% | 34 |
| #6 | Chebum | 44% | 32 |
| #7 | Drimksu | 42% | 33 |
| #8 | lõngus | 41% | 41 |
| #9 | rumpzoo | 31% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bo$$u. | 7 | 0.0097 |
| #2 | Drimksu | 5 | 0.0078 |
| #3 | rumpzoo | 4 | 0.0112 |
| #4 | Chebum | 3 | 0.0045 |
| #5 | lõngus | 2 | 0.0024 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | topg | 146 | 0.20 | 4 min |
| #2 | ヌースカイネン | 115 | 0.29 | 2 min |
| #3 | lõngus | 73 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #4 | rumpzoo | 73 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| #5 | Bo$$u. | 66 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ヌースカイネン | +3.08 | 75 | 57 |
| #2 | Armadyl | +2.35 | 81 | 55 |
| #3 | lõngus | +0.78 | 86 | 59 |
| #4 | Bo$$u. | -0.40 | 66 | 58 |
| #5 | topg | -0.60 | 74 | 65 |





