










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 129 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 10 matches | ||
| Premier | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
614 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,090 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 288 | 26% |
| Smokes | 277 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 390 | 36% |
| Molotovs | 135 | 12% |
Our logs show you have wasted $181,821 of utility $170 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 74 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MOLOMOCO | 89% | 9 |
| #2 | Trïnïty | 88% | 16 |
| #3 | JohnEddy | 80% | 25 |
| #4 | adandz69 | 73% | 11 |
| #5 | ........... | 71% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JohnEddy | 38 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #2 | McLovin | 26 | 0.20 | 1 min |
| #3 | MOMOLOCO | 12 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| #4 | ........... | 8 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| #5 | adandz69 | 7 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | keepomeister | +4.34 | 78 | 54 |
| #2 | MOLOMOCO | +4.31 | 75 | 21 |
| #3 | MOMOLOCO | +3.50 | 75 | 23 |
| #4 | adandz69 | +0.90 | 58 | 36 |
| #5 | ........... | +0.15 | 47 | 33 |





