








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 587 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 166 matches | ||
| Faceit | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2821 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,974 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3539 | 32% |
| Smokes | 2274 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 2168 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 2993 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $749,540 of utility $126 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 116 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Volk | 57% | 46 |
| #2 | linko | 52% | 182 |
| #3 | OASIS | 52% | 23 |
| #4 | SkeLr_ | 52% | 98 |
| #5 | nexalotapus~ | 52% | 83 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | Matt [M] | 46% | 67 |
| #11 | LarrcasM | 46% | 96 |
| #12 | deathr0w | 45% | 44 |
| #13 | Buju | 36% | 22 |
| #14 | ill chell hehe | 32% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Abiser | 8 | 0.0047 |
| #2 | linko | 7 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | SkeLr_ | 4 | 0.0019 |
| #4 | Grimlock [M] | 4 | 0.0036 |
| #5 | Volk | 3 | 0.0032 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | linko | 757 | 0.20 | 18 min |
| #2 | Matt [M] | 333 | 0.23 | 9 min |
| #3 | SkeLr_ | 205 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #4 | Volk | 153 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| #5 | Abiser | 121 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Buju | +3.89 | 75 | 71 |
| #2 | linko | +3.67 | 90 | 64 |
| #3 | Grimlock [M] | +1.15 | 78 | 62 |
| #4 | mst | +0.65 | 80 | 71 |
| #5 | {o} blak | +0.52 | 75 | 60 |





