








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 471 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 222 matches | ||
| Faceit | 210 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 22 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4760 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,314 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5552 | 26% |
| Smokes | 6415 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 3843 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 5504 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,557,699 of utility $142 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 317 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | R1K0CH3T | 67% | 27 |
| #2 | mills | 60% | 52 |
| #3 | Cluuless | 54% | 37 |
| #4 | Parrish | 52% | 130 |
| #5 | Tywz_ | 51% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #13 | playstationpizza | 46% | 90 |
| #14 | Bronzey | 45% | 119 |
| #15 | Chief Shababawoowoo | 44% | 41 |
| #16 | ◀Crona▶ | 42% | 31 |
| #17 | megatallicayer | 38% | 42 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bronzey | 4 | 0.0016 |
| #2 | playstationpizza | 4 | 0.0021 |
| #3 | mills | 3 | 0.0025 |
| #4 | Sto0kerz | 3 | 0.0038 |
| #5 | R1K0CH3T | 3 | 0.0051 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ttv_aerglo66 | 352 | 0.24 | 9 min |
| #2 | playstationpizza | 331 | 0.17 | 8 min |
| #3 | mills | 276 | 0.23 | 8 min |
| #4 | Sto0kerz | 265 | 0.34 | 8 min |
| #5 | CrayZ | 240 | 0.19 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mills | +3.32 | 72 | 68 |
| #2 | Bronzey | +1.51 | 65 | 67 |
| #3 | djtl | +0.87 | 71 | 63 |
| #4 | R1K0CH3T | +0.45 | 62 | 63 |
| #5 | Parrish | +0.13 | 68 | 36 |





