








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 442 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 114 matches | ||
| Premier | 64 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2905 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,569 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3872 | 31% |
| Smokes | 3502 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2312 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 2883 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $505,272 of utility $90 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 145 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Akuryo | 61% | 18 |
| #2 | Move | 61% | 36 |
| #3 | djtl | 60% | 52 |
| #4 | Still | 59% | 17 |
| #5 | brian | 59% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ʜᴇᴀʟɴᴄʀᴜꜱʜ | 8 | 0.0040 |
| #2 | Move | 5 | 0.0060 |
| #3 | konotoki | 4 | 0.0022 |
| #4 | Parrish | 3 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | Ranch | 3 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ʜᴇᴀʟɴᴄʀᴜꜱʜ | 429 | 0.21 | 11 min |
| #2 | konotoki | 345 | 0.19 | 10 min |
| #3 | djtl | 323 | 0.27 | 8 min |
| #4 | Sto0kerz | 199 | 0.39 | 5 min |
| #5 | Jt5mith | 124 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mills | +3.23 | 71 | 68 |
| #2 | Still | +1.44 | 84 | 51 |
| #3 | ʜᴇᴀʟɴᴄʀᴜꜱʜ | +1.16 | 68 | 68 |
| #4 | Ryan | +1.12 | 79 | 71 |
| #5 | Move | +0.72 | 84 | 59 |





