








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 455 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 299 matches | ||
| Wingman | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 41 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3142 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,631 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4710 | 27% |
| Smokes | 4230 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 4876 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 3815 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,128,541 of utility $131 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 534 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BoZzMaC | 56% | 90 |
| #2 | NEBB | 55% | 75 |
| #3 | Sted | 53% | 317 |
| #4 | Mulli | 48% | 235 |
| #5 | Eisbaerg | 44% | 99 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BoZzMaC | 56% | 90 |
| #2 | NEBB | 55% | 75 |
| #3 | Sted | 53% | 317 |
| #4 | Mulli | 48% | 235 |
| #5 | Eisbaerg | 44% | 99 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sted | 9 | 0.0013 |
| #2 | Mulli | 8 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | NEBB | 5 | 0.0030 |
| #4 | BoZzMaC | 3 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | Eisbaerg | 1 | 0.0005 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sted | 678 | 0.10 | 17 min |
| #2 | NEBB | 406 | 0.25 | 13 min |
| #3 | Eisbaerg | 204 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #4 | Mulli | 178 | 0.04 | 4 min |
| #5 | BoZzMaC | 49 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NEBB | +1.87 | 68 | 67 |
| #2 | BoZzMaC | +1.33 | 66 | 48 |
| #3 | Sted | +0.36 | 67 | 64 |
| #4 | Eisbaerg | +0.24 | 59 | 58 |
| #5 | ⎛⎝ Rupel ⎠⎞ | -0.73 | 40 | 65 |





