








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 71 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
414 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,075 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 265 | 25% |
| Smokes | 247 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 215 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 348 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $130,588 of utility $170 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 15 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | toan | 73% | 26 |
| #2 | jAw_sOmE | 73% | 22 |
| #3 | Lenny | 71% | 34 |
| #4 | VSN | 67% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | toan | 73% | 26 |
| #2 | jAw_sOmE | 73% | 22 |
| #3 | Lenny | 71% | 34 |
| #4 | VSN | 67% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jAw_sOmE | 2 | 0.0049 |
| #2 | Lenny | 1 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | VSN | 1 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | VSN | 125 | 0.24 | 5 min |
| #2 | Lenny | 113 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #3 | jAw_sOmE | 73 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| #4 | toan | 67 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | VSN | +2.74 | 81 | 77 |
| #2 | toan | +1.78 | 83 | 66 |
| #3 | Lenny | +1.52 | 82 | 67 |
| #4 | encore | +1.48 | 83 | 58 |
| #5 | jAw_sOmE | +0.56 | 85 | 64 |





