








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2479 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 440 matches | ||
| Faceit | 313 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 144 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8312 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 45,896 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 12900 | 28% |
| Smokes | 10746 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 10320 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 11930 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,836,240 of utility $99 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 83 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | solidi | 61% | 57 |
| #2 | teb | 60% | 84 |
| #3 | JaansKA:_D | 59% | 88 |
| #4 | Blizhazard | 55% | 105 |
| #5 | Daddy Longlegs | 55% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #16 | N3xtSt3p | 46% | 147 |
| #17 | TilttiTuukko | 46% | 134 |
| #18 | Jaakko | 44% | 136 |
| #19 | skidd0 | 41% | 136 |
| #20 | kenguru300 | 40% | 50 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | N3xtSt3p | 9 | 0.0028 |
| #2 | frs | 7 | 0.0006 |
| #3 | Por1lainen | 7 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | JaansKA:_D | 7 | 0.0037 |
| #5 | Jaakko | 6 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | frs | 1724 | 0.15 | 48 min |
| #2 | Por1lainen | 666 | 0.13 | 18 min |
| #3 | cs____janne | 507 | 0.12 | 13 min |
| #4 | Blizhazard | 464 | 0.20 | 11 min |
| #5 | JaansKA:_D | 460 | 0.25 | 10 min |





