








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 512 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 165 matches | ||
| Faceit | 86 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 34 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2157 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,989 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3674 | 25% |
| Smokes | 2957 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 4269 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 4089 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,013,191 of utility $144 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 217 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | thmz | 58% | 38 |
| #2 | bRUTUS | 54% | 28 |
| #3 | Valio Play Maitokaakao | 53% | 32 |
| #4 | DimEEE | 50% | 123 |
| #5 | Kuumo | 49% | 122 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | Foxeriino | 43% | 35 |
| #10 | Grazziella | 39% | 70 |
| #11 | BuQi | 37% | 35 |
| #12 | Swagalee | 37% | 35 |
| #13 | Arkkienkeli69 | 34% | 50 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kuidemæn | 15 | 0.0036 |
| #2 | Kuumo | 6 | 0.0024 |
| #3 | DimEEE | 5 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | Swagalee | 5 | 0.0081 |
| #5 | BuQi | 4 | 0.0053 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kuidemæn | 628 | 0.15 | 16 min |
| #2 | Karppi | 224 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #3 | skutsi +rep | 222 | 0.08 | 6 min |
| #4 | Kuumo | 154 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| #5 | thmz | 122 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | thmz | +4.11 | 92 | 78 |
| #2 | bRUTUS | +3.76 | 70 | 59 |
| #3 | Valio Play Maitokaakao | +2.40 | 69 | 40 |
| #4 | skutsi +rep | +1.84 | 61 | 67 |
| #5 | BuQi | +1.53 | 60 | 70 |





