








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 608 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 130 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 90 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 69 matches | ||
| Faceit | 68 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 60 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




141 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7584 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,816 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5416 | 26% |
| Smokes | 6131 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 3896 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 5373 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,835,845 of utility $134 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 491 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ritzii | 67 | 0.0186 |
| #2 | coN | 64 | 0.0230 |
| #3 | Erwins Right Arm | 33 | 0.0257 |
| #4 | darksmurfs | 29 | 0.0135 |
| #5 | CrankItMan | 13 | 0.0060 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ritzii | 1057 | 0.29 | 22 min |
| #2 | CrankItMan | 435 | 0.20 | 12 min |
| #3 | nukelearbullet | 377 | 0.25 | 10 min |
| #4 | coN | 375 | 0.13 | 8 min |
| #5 | D4nGr | 371 | 0.24 | 11 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | coN | +2.19 | 68 | 53 |
| #2 | CrankItMan | +2.13 | 90 | 68 |
| #3 | Kroney | +2.08 | 75 | 62 |
| #4 | Bubs | +1.29 | 80 | 65 |
| #5 | ritzii | +0.30 | 52 | 66 |





