








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 720 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 60 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 22 matches | ||
| Wingman | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 59 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1694 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,822 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2338 | 30% |
| Smokes | 1600 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 1891 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1993 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $541,754 of utility $154 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 378 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | d0xN | 62% | 66 |
| #2 | foxy | 60% | 128 |
| #3 | mulde | 58% | 19 |
| #4 | Links flashen rechts bashen | 57% | 21 |
| #5 | r𝐳ミy | 55% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | PLixX | 50% | 62 |
| #7 | toan | 45% | 20 |
| #8 | Loidman | 45% | 20 |
| #9 | Lenny | 40% | 10 |
| #10 | I'm in Space | 36% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Links flashen rechts bashen | 5 | 0.0117 |
| #2 | PLixX | 3 | 0.0024 |
| #3 | d0xN | 2 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | r𝐳ミy | 2 | 0.0048 |
| #5 | foxy | 1 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | d0xN | 231 | 0.18 | 6 min |
| #2 | PLixX | 155 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #3 | foxy | 153 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| #4 | Loidman | 73 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| #5 | toan | 68 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mulde | +2.71 | 81 | 73 |
| #2 | Loidman | +2.63 | 87 | 68 |
| #3 | d0xN | +2.31 | 88 | 71 |
| #4 | n♕iv | +1.70 | 75 | 73 |
| #5 | Links flashen rechts bashen | +0.99 | 93 | 63 |





