








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1004 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 337 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 75 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 65 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 64 matches | ||
| Esplay | 16 matches | 1,840 | |
| Competitive Overpass | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 46 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




32 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6399 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,529 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3086 | 16% |
| Smokes | 6169 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 4598 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 5676 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,250,265 of utility $166 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 222 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bonde | 15 | 0.0015 |
| #2 | cocaine on a night out | 7 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | Hercules | 6 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | Baba G | 4 | 0.0024 |
| #5 | Hemmelighetsklassifisert | 3 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bonde | 746 | 0.08 | 17 min |
| #2 | cocaine on a night out | 632 | 0.15 | 19 min |
| #3 | Hemmelighetsklassifisert | 604 | 0.16 | 19 min |
| #4 | Baba G | 306 | 0.19 | 11 min |
| #5 | Hercules | 265 | 0.07 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fabulous | +2.36 | 67 | 60 |
| #2 | Smint4S | +1.10 | 50 | 48 |
| #3 | cocaine on a night out | +0.64 | 52 | 74 |
| #4 | Baba G | +0.56 | 65 | 75 |
| #5 | Hemmelighetsklassifisert | +0.56 | 50 | 77 |





