








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 48 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 202 matches | ||
| Premier | 127 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1540 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,418 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5091 | 31% |
| Smokes | 5697 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 2088 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 3542 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $636,572 of utility $130 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 226 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NFL YoungBoy | 61% | 46 |
| #2 | Pharaoh | 61% | 28 |
| #3 | MyKeys | 61% | 38 |
| #4 | NoHit | 57% | 23 |
| #5 | Tgunz | 55% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | paintball4151617181 | 47% | 36 |
| #11 | Yami | 47% | 45 |
| #12 | d4rk | 45% | 29 |
| #13 | P_moT | 45% | 96 |
| #14 | Lemons | 38% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Yami | 2 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | paintball4151617181 | 2 | 0.0031 |
| #3 | P_moT | 1 | 0.0010 |
| #4 | JoJo | 1 | 0.0023 |
| #5 | Mattyyy | 1 | 0.0030 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Yami | 63 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #2 | Lemons | 39 | 0.58 | 1 min |
| #3 | TheDuuuude | 31 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #4 | Tgunz | 23 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #5 | P_moT | 20 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Yami | +2.64 | 78 | 65 |
| #2 | Tgunz | +2.13 | 81 | 45 |
| #3 | FoldingChairJohnson | +0.17 | 75 | 35 |
| #4 | Pharaoh | +0.12 | 61 | 67 |
| #5 | MyKeys | +0.05 | 83 | 66 |





