










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 34 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Esplay | 110 matches | 1,702 | |
| Faceit | 42 matches | ||
| Premier | 5 matches | ||
| Renown | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 32 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1082 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,952 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 558 | 9% |
| Smokes | 1944 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 2084 | 35% |
| Molotovs | 1366 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,059,150 of utility $240 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 50 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | s | 59% | 37 |
| #2 | Rewnie | 58% | 83 |
| #3 | magnejulkveld | 53% | 103 |
| #4 | vibZ3t0r1 | 51% | 37 |
| #5 | ✪chris | 50% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kooba | 477 | 0.16 | 13 min |
| #2 | Rewnie | 304 | 0.16 | 8 min |
| #3 | s | 236 | 0.29 | 6 min |
| #4 | magnejulkveld | 197 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #5 | R. | 146 | 0.18 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | R. | +3.44 | 54 | 83 |
| #2 | vibZ3t0r1 | +2.30 | 61 | 74 |
| #3 | magnejulkveld | +2.09 | 76 | 69 |
| #4 | s | +1.87 | 59 | 75 |
| #5 | DRIFT9LE | +0.82 | 56 | 70 |





