








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
387 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,154 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 303 | 26% |
| Smokes | 263 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 283 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 305 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $97,289 of utility $147 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gryphon | 81% | 21 |
| #2 | fishfromriver | 79% | 34 |
| #3 | den1s | 74% | 39 |
| #4 | kamen | 74% | 39 |
| #5 | Fdesee | 67% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | fishfromriver | 79% | 34 |
| #3 | den1s | 74% | 39 |
| #4 | kamen | 74% | 39 |
| #5 | Fdesee | 67% | 3 |
| #6 | Skyboy1963 | 60% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kamen | 8 | 0.0121 |
| #2 | fishfromriver | 3 | 0.0045 |
| #3 | den1s | 1 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kamen | 177 | 0.27 | 5 min |
| #2 | fishfromriver | 146 | 0.22 | 4 min |
| #3 | den1s | 88 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #4 | Gryphon | 46 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #5 | Skyboy1963 | 34 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gryphon | +2.46 | 66 | 57 |
| #2 | den1s | +1.48 | 63 | 65 |
| #3 | kamen | +1.11 | 75 | 75 |
| #4 | Appl4f1tters | +0.92 | 85 | 61 |
| #5 | fishfromriver | +0.46 | 74 | 69 |





