








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 520 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 196 matches | ||
| Esplay | 7 matches | 1,904 | |
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3016 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,096 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2216 | 24% |
| Smokes | 2600 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1956 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 2324 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $634,927 of utility $113 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 31 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #13 | Matrim Cauthon | 50% | 16 |
| #14 | KBomark | 44% | 18 |
| #15 | AnkMupp | 43% | 37 |
| #16 | Deejay xD | 43% | 21 |
| #17 | Adolen | 36% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Spindeln? | 2 | 0.0024 |
| #2 | ☆Joanito☆ | 2 | 0.0035 |
| #3 | Mobbad tjockis med automatvapen | 2 | 0.0056 |
| #4 | Matrim Cauthon | 2 | 0.0061 |
| #5 | BerryGirl | 1 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ☆Joanito☆ | 103 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| #2 | BerryGirl | 97 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #3 | Spindeln? | 84 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #4 | Deejay xD | 82 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| #5 | AnkMupp | 77 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ☆Joanito☆ | +4.12 | 85 | 49 |
| #2 | Mobbad tjockis med automatvapen | +2.75 | 81 | 62 |
| #3 | Nawon 유♡ | +2.28 | 80 | 63 |
| #4 | GeneralRetard ツ | +2.23 | 82 | 67 |
| #5 | Nalle4K | +2.12 | 87 | 75 |





