








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 429 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 282 matches | ||
| Faceit | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 65 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2980 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,456 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3092 | 21% |
| Smokes | 3525 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 4274 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 3565 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,167,459 of utility $141 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 250 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Aksu | 67% | 21 |
| #2 | esa | 60% | 50 |
| #3 | batiGOOOL | 56% | 62 |
| #4 | [-Puijo-] moll1 | 56% | 43 |
| #5 | Alikessu | 56% | 61 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Alikessu | 56% | 61 |
| #6 | mizq | 56% | 27 |
| #7 | bobi | 54% | 24 |
| #8 | RasvaMauri | 54% | 24 |
| #9 | Pasi Kuivalainen | 45% | 53 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Alikessu | 2 | 0.0015 |
| #2 | [-Puijo-] moll1 | 1 | 0.0011 |
| #3 | RasvaMauri | 1 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Alikessu | 363 | 0.27 | 12 min |
| #2 | batiGOOOL | 278 | 0.20 | 7 min |
| #3 | Pasi Kuivalainen | 185 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| #4 | esa | 157 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #5 | [-Puijo-] moll1 | 145 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Alikessu | +2.81 | 79 | 88 |
| #2 | Aksu | +2.66 | 79 | 62 |
| #3 | mizq | +1.83 | 60 | 78 |
| #4 | bobi | +1.63 | 61 | 80 |
| #5 | RasvaMauri | +0.87 | 66 | 73 |





