








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 434 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 197 matches | ||
| Faceit | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 56 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3538 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,562 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3666 | 29% |
| Smokes | 3705 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1302 | 10% |
| Molotovs | 3889 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $985,055 of utility $139 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 223 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | d0nut | 59% | 109 |
| #2 | lwS | 59% | 46 |
| #3 | ✪ #ToTal | 56% | 61 |
| #4 | >Th[i]S< | 55% | 47 |
| #5 | dErp | 46% | 136 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | ✪ #ToTal | 56% | 61 |
| #4 | >Th[i]S< | 55% | 47 |
| #5 | dErp | 46% | 136 |
| #6 | LEGO | 44% | 104 |
| #7 | Cinco. | 39% | 122 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | d0nut | 17 | 0.0078 |
| #2 | LEGO | 9 | 0.0040 |
| #3 | lwS | 6 | 0.0065 |
| #4 | dErp | 3 | 0.0010 |
| #5 | ✪ #ToTal | 3 | 0.0024 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | d0nut | 336 | 0.15 | 10 min |
| #2 | lwS | 228 | 0.25 | 7 min |
| #3 | dErp | 197 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #4 | Cinco. | 176 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #5 | >Th[i]S< | 124 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lwS | +3.32 | 82 | 75 |
| #2 | d0nut | +2.90 | 70 | 69 |
| #3 | issa | +1.17 | 64 | 63 |
| #4 | >Th[i]S< | +0.59 | 61 | 70 |
| #5 | LEGO | +0.18 | 54 | 61 |





