








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1104 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 116 matches | ||
| Premier | 107 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 43 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




38 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3467 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,769 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 941 | 20% |
| Smokes | 626 | 13% |
| HE Grenades | 2159 | 45% |
| Molotovs | 1043 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $480,357 of utility $53 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1970 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lil' Pants | 9 | 0.0080 |
| #2 | Fuzzy3 | 7 | 0.0055 |
| #3 | Draws | 7 | 0.0076 |
| #4 | Russ | 5 | 0.0018 |
| #5 | Ree Tar Dead | 4 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ree Tar Dead | 625 | 0.32 | 14 min |
| #2 | muslim racho | 354 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| #3 | Ashe | 335 | 0.27 | 8 min |
| #4 | Bing | 216 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #5 | Russ | 137 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Draws | +5.08 | 84 | 65 |
| #2 | ɯ:ɹƃ | +2.64 | 84 | 34 |
| #3 | 🗲spacePuppy | +1.97 | 58 | 63 |
| #4 | Russ | +1.87 | 67 | 51 |
| #5 | Russell3 | +1.41 | 61 | 63 |





