








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 139 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
765 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,556 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 914 | 36% |
| Smokes | 356 | 14% |
| HE Grenades | 566 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 720 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $607,382 of utility $263 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 454 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NK | 56% | 9 |
| #2 | Tofana | 55% | 11 |
| #3 | gauNN | 54% | 13 |
| #4 | P1ti-IWNL | 52% | 21 |
| #5 | ScareD. | 44% | 41 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | vlad | 29% | 17 |
| #11 | Sebi | 27% | 11 |
| #12 | Femi | 24% | 45 |
| #13 | Diar | 17% | 6 |
| #14 | Crynoore | 0% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ScareD. | 238 | 0.27 | 7 min |
| #2 | P1ti-IWNL | 100 | 0.22 | 2 min |
| #3 | ReY | 88 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #4 | rellüM | 75 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #5 | Femi | 66 | 0.07 | 2 min |





