








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 246 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 172 matches | ||
| Faceit | 72 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 36 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2553 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,056 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3547 | 25% |
| Smokes | 4135 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 3091 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 3283 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $615,558 of utility $100 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 33 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ℝ𝕪𝕚𝕒𝕙 | 56% | 75 |
| #2 | .tobzen | 55% | 38 |
| #3 | sQuuu | 53% | 17 |
| #4 | Leif | 53% | 17 |
| #5 | seek | 53% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | Super n0u* | 46% | 39 |
| #11 | fakeme | 45% | 124 |
| #12 | Danyio | 42% | 24 |
| #13 | xWALD. | 40% | 15 |
| #14 | riAlicious | 35% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fakeme | 14 | 0.0052 |
| #2 | Grizi | 8 | 0.0021 |
| #3 | GENjiii~ | 4 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | riAlicious | 3 | 0.0059 |
| #5 | Leif | 2 | 0.0052 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fakeme | 514 | 0.19 | 14 min |
| #2 | Grizi | 434 | 0.11 | 11 min |
| #3 | GENjiii~ | 358 | 0.14 | 10 min |
| #4 | seek | 137 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #5 | ℝ𝕪𝕚𝕒𝕙 | 103 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Leif | +2.91 | 86 | 66 |
| #2 | fakeme | +2.61 | 81 | 73 |
| #3 | .tobzen | +1.23 | 93 | 51 |
| #4 | Markusio510 | +0.86 | 81 | 60 |
| #5 | Erik Zion | +0.84 | 81 | 74 |





