








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 45 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 34 matches | ||
| Premier | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1654 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,061 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1839 | 23% |
| Smokes | 1796 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 2475 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 1951 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $222,555 of utility $58 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 75 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Banana | 59% | 76 |
| #2 | Zen | 56% | 150 |
| #3 | TrelL | 55% | 69 |
| #4 | Kirby ~ Scouts | 55% | 97 |
| #5 | Just A Game `e` | 53% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | TrelL | 55% | 69 |
| #4 | Kirby ~ Scouts | 55% | 97 |
| #5 | Just A Game `e` | 53% | 40 |
| #6 | intxx.64 | 46% | 28 |
| #7 | OBSQ | 46% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kirby ~ Scouts | 2 | 0.0010 |
| #2 | Banana | 2 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | Just A Game `e` | 2 | 0.0024 |
| #4 | OBSQ | 2 | 0.0025 |
| #5 | Zen | 1 | 0.0003 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zen | 402 | 0.13 | 11 min |
| #2 | Kirby ~ Scouts | 200 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #3 | Banana | 162 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #4 | intxx.64 | 84 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #5 | OBSQ | 78 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zen | +2.53 | 80 | 68 |
| #2 | Kirby ~ Scouts | +2.06 | 78 | 71 |
| #3 | Banana | +0.77 | 65 | 67 |
| #4 | Maxximou5 | +0.47 | 66 | 73 |
| #5 | Just A Game `e` | +0.36 | 58 | 55 |





