








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1302 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 465 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 84 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 22 matches | ||
| Faceit | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 119 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




36 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6294 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 37,108 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8237 | 22% |
| Smokes | 10080 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 10503 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 8288 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,834,216 of utility $103 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 476 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | biiiddy | 58% | 212 |
| #2 | brandon | 52% | 298 |
| #3 | Viiiddy | 52% | 252 |
| #4 | Spinny | 52% | 503 |
| #5 | Look A Hat | 51% | 219 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Viiiddy | 52% | 252 |
| #4 | Spinny | 52% | 503 |
| #5 | Look A Hat | 51% | 219 |
| #6 | Fregley | 49% | 59 |
| #7 | Lando | 40% | 63 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Spinny | 25 | 0.0024 |
| #2 | Viiiddy | 12 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | brandon | 11 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | biiiddy | 6 | 0.0014 |
| #5 | Look A Hat | 4 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Spinny | 1350 | 0.13 | 38 min |
| #2 | Viiiddy | 1195 | 0.23 | 34 min |
| #3 | biiiddy | 922 | 0.21 | 26 min |
| #4 | brandon | 912 | 0.15 | 21 min |
| #5 | Look A Hat | 443 | 0.10 | 11 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | biiiddy | +1.65 | 67 | 76 |
| #2 | Hairy Polish Guy | +1.18 | 57 | 70 |
| #3 | brandon | +0.84 | 52 | 58 |
| #4 | Viiiddy | +0.41 | 70 | 75 |
| #5 | Spinny | -0.31 | 60 | 74 |





