








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 574 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 391 matches | ||
| Faceit | 230 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Renown | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 223 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




35 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6890 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,730 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2894 | 15% |
| Smokes | 7900 | 42% |
| HE Grenades | 2861 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 5075 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,612,509 of utility $234 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 148 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jojo fantaisie | 51% | 76 |
| #2 | Bobze | 51% | 335 |
| #3 | Alex-PW | 48% | 84 |
| #4 | Geronimo | 47% | 288 |
| #5 | n44s | 47% | 135 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Bobze | 51% | 335 |
| #3 | Alex-PW | 48% | 84 |
| #4 | Geronimo | 47% | 288 |
| #5 | n44s | 47% | 135 |
| #6 | Y9WANN ✠ | 46% | 244 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bobze | 14 | 0.0019 |
| #2 | Geronimo | 9 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | Y9WANN ✠ | 8 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | n44s | 5 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Y9WANN ✠ | 1451 | 0.28 | 42 min |
| #2 | Bobze | 1268 | 0.17 | 31 min |
| #3 | Geronimo | 950 | 0.16 | 25 min |
| #4 | n44s | 433 | 0.15 | 14 min |
| #5 | Jojo fantaisie | 127 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | n44s | +1.42 | 82 | 80 |
| #2 | Geronimo | +1.28 | 70 | 75 |
| #3 | Bobze | +0.74 | 77 | 62 |
| #4 | Y9WANN ✠ | +0.07 | 64 | 69 |
| #5 | ><))> | -0.10 | 77 | 54 |





