








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 92 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 56 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1291 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,137 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 720 | 17% |
| Smokes | 953 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1147 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1317 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $572,600 of utility $154 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 140 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pÖTYI | 80% | 10 |
| #2 | loXe | 76% | 21 |
| #3 | FlexX | 57% | 14 |
| #4 | Balogh | 56% | 116 |
| #5 | Medvepoc | 48% | 63 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | FlexX | 57% | 14 |
| #4 | Balogh | 56% | 116 |
| #5 | Medvepoc | 48% | 63 |
| #6 | Csaboka | 47% | 78 |
| #7 | nur` - RE | 45% | 71 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Balogh | 6 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | nur` - RE | 6 | 0.0041 |
| #3 | Csaboka | 4 | 0.0025 |
| #4 | loXe | 4 | 0.0101 |
| #5 | FlexX | 4 | 0.0141 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Balogh | 405 | 0.17 | 10 min |
| #2 | Medvepoc | 151 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #3 | nur` - RE | 129 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #4 | loXe | 102 | 0.26 | 3 min |
| #5 | FlexX | 65 | 0.23 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Balogh | +5.73 | 93 | 74 |
| #2 | loXe | +3.59 | 83 | 59 |
| #3 | Medvepoc | +1.07 | 56 | 72 |
| #4 | FlexX | +1.02 | 58 | 72 |
| #5 | pÖTYI | +0.45 | 57 | 68 |





