








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 293 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 179 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 36 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2020 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,931 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1391 | 20% |
| Smokes | 1952 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1777 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1811 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $902,182 of utility $189 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 519 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KatzederHund | 50% | 101 |
| #2 | Pischan Number One | 50% | 20 |
| #3 | Grymo | 48% | 21 |
| #4 | HARALD | 47% | 144 |
| #5 | M1CHAL16 | 46% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | __SiXa* | 44% | 32 |
| #11 | Taskmanager | 42% | 43 |
| #12 | bilbo.- | 42% | 12 |
| #13 | J0N1 | 40% | 20 |
| #14 | Wallah mach nicht so ☂ | 27% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ★LtR★ | 9 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | KatzederHund | 6 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | Krosso | 5 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | HARALD | 4 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | Wallah mach nicht so ☂ | 2 | 0.0063 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ★LtR★ | 299 | 0.10 | 8 min |
| #2 | HARALD | 295 | 0.09 | 9 min |
| #3 | KatzederHund | 286 | 0.13 | 8 min |
| #4 | Krosso | 164 | 0.05 | 4 min |
| #5 | Taskmanager | 143 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gh0sT | +0.48 | 57 | 72 |
| #2 | Wallah mach nicht so ☂ | +0.35 | 66 | 68 |
| #3 | HARALD | +0.31 | 58 | 78 |
| #4 | bilbo.- | +0.05 | 80 | 71 |
| #5 | Bruno el Perro | -0.07 | 80 | 61 |





