








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 50 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 27 matches | ||
| Premier | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
447 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,830 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 376 | 21% |
| Smokes | 618 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 332 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 504 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $233,352 of utility $157 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Keheveli | 55% | 22 |
| #2 | Anpuja | 52% | 31 |
| #3 | Juso | 50% | 4 |
| #4 | Naksuap | 45% | 22 |
| #5 | Luokkala | 44% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Juso | 50% | 4 |
| #4 | Naksuap | 45% | 22 |
| #5 | Luokkala | 44% | 27 |
| #6 | Sniffaister | 39% | 46 |
| #7 | Boldis | 33% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sniffaister | 2 | 0.0019 |
| #2 | Luokkala | 2 | 0.0031 |
| #3 | Anpuja | 1 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Anpuja | 74 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #2 | Luokkala | 73 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #3 | Sniffaister | 57 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #4 | Naksuap | 54 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #5 | Keheveli | 47 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Anpuja | +2.83 | 82 | 65 |
| #2 | Keheveli | +2.42 | 77 | 63 |
| #3 | Luokkala | -0.20 | 67 | 69 |
| #4 | Juso | -0.70 | 81 | 36 |
| #5 | Naksuap | -1.17 | 71 | 65 |





