








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 444 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 116 matches | ||
| Premier | 76 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Renown | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 48 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2113 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,443 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1651 | 22% |
| Smokes | 1683 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1979 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 2130 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $780,335 of utility $159 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 290 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Carrado | 80% | 15 |
| #2 | T3Ch | 68% | 25 |
| #3 | Kappello | 64% | 14 |
| #4 | ✪Ferriwie2k | 62% | 21 |
| #5 | Inuyasha | 56% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Kappello | 64% | 14 |
| #4 | ✪Ferriwie2k | 62% | 21 |
| #5 | Inuyasha | 56% | 18 |
| #6 | Chiki | 51% | 41 |
| #7 | Creature_Sliver | 47% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chiki | 4 | 0.0046 |
| #2 | ✪Ferriwie2k | 2 | 0.0047 |
| #3 | Creature_Sliver | 1 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | Carrado | 1 | 0.0032 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chiki | 190 | 0.22 | 6 min |
| #2 | T3Ch | 167 | 0.32 | 4 min |
| #3 | Inuyasha | 88 | 0.24 | 3 min |
| #4 | Kappello | 56 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| #5 | Creature_Sliver | 44 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kappello | +3.02 | 61 | 67 |
| #2 | Mrk992 | +1.32 | 79 | 53 |
| #3 | Inuyasha | +1.27 | 80 | 82 |
| #4 | T3Ch | +1.00 | 67 | 69 |
| #5 | Carrado | +0.94 | 58 | 69 |





