








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 138 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 95 matches | ||
| Wingman | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 21 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 47 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1310 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,158 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 694 | 17% |
| Smokes | 1216 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1375 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 873 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $215,020 of utility $61 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 520 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tristan :) | 57% | 21 |
| #2 | Lightning McQueen | 50% | 12 |
| #3 | Crassus | 46% | 57 |
| #4 | Zuid Holland | 45% | 11 |
| #5 | SuperLion | 40% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | The Ox. | 9 | 0.0046 |
| #2 | Man Met de Gele Cowboyhoed | 3 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | Tristan :) | 3 | 0.0071 |
| #4 | Lightning McQueen | 3 | 0.0126 |
| #5 | Crassus | 2 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | The Ox. | 142 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #2 | Man Met de Gele Cowboyhoed | 94 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #3 | Crassus | 90 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #4 | du_Foef^ | 33 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| #5 | Lightning McQueen | 33 | 0.14 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Man Met de Gele Cowboyhoed | +2.73 | 74 | 58 |
| #2 | Tristan :) | +2.51 | 85 | 37 |
| #3 | du_Foef^ | +1.19 | 55 | 47 |
| #4 | Lightning McQueen | +0.60 | 49 | 43 |
| #5 | The Ox. | -0.13 | 68 | 68 |





