








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 55 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 109 matches | ||
| Faceit | 61 matches | ||
| Wingman | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2139 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,476 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2824 | 30% |
| Smokes | 2274 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 2472 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1906 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $516,180 of utility $110 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 9 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RUDY[u_u] | 66% | 32 |
| #2 | prnd | 65% | 17 |
| #3 | elluj | 64% | 22 |
| #4 | ana | 59% | 27 |
| #5 | El Osmo | 59% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #12 | jeesus | 46% | 13 |
| #13 | gaslipstick | 45% | 62 |
| #14 | LIVONE | 42% | 19 |
| #15 | Baamio | 39% | 23 |
| #16 | masu | 31% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RUDY[u_u] | +2.97 | 76 | 69 |
| #2 | jeesus | +2.56 | 81 | 73 |
| #3 | ana | +2.53 | 76 | 81 |
| #4 | pwder | +1.55 | 84 | 72 |
| #5 | elluj | +1.48 | 81 | 62 |





