








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1268 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 370 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 192 matches | ||
| Faceit | 106 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 102 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 60 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 111 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




47 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
11386 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 35,454 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 13737 | 39% |
| Smokes | 2845 | 8% |
| HE Grenades | 11527 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 7345 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $782,657 of utility $36 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 174 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | mairou | 52% | 468 |
| #7 | shamizi | 52% | 601 |
| #8 | LDLD | 52% | 529 |
| #9 | Jesse. | 51% | 294 |
| #10 | aCKe | 50% | 70 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LDLD | 35 | 0.0032 |
| #2 | fili #huo † 🤏 | 33 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | mairou | 21 | 0.0022 |
| #4 | shamizi | 8 | 0.0006 |
| #5 | Jesse. | 8 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | shamizi | 1969 | 0.16 | 55 min |
| #2 | mairou | 1745 | 0.18 | 49 min |
| #3 | LDLD | 1582 | 0.14 | 40 min |
| #4 | fili #huo † 🤏 | 1460 | 0.07 | 39 min |
| #5 | kimmo ♡ | 784 | 0.21 | 24 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LDLD | +0.98 | 82 | 65 |
| #2 | Sirkkeli | +0.81 | 80 | 69 |
| #3 | Portto | +0.63 | 71 | 69 |
| #4 | fili #huo † 🤏 | +0.28 | 70 | 64 |
| #5 | shamizi | +0.19 | 69 | 63 |





