








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 272 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 170 matches | ||
| Faceit | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 49 matches | ||
| Wingman | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




38 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5015 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,644 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2998 | 20% |
| Smokes | 4969 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 3077 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 3600 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,605,313 of utility $167 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 55 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♛k1nG_cRowN♛ EveryRoundFullBuy | 54% | 35 |
| #2 | x-ReFleX-x | 54% | 111 |
| #3 | oilman | 53% | 195 |
| #4 | ✘₭㋡M₱ⱠɆ✘ | 52% | 65 |
| #5 | BIGGEST GABE | 51% | 148 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BIGGEST GABE | 11 | 0.0035 |
| #2 | Naxx'Ril | 10 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | oilman | 10 | 0.0024 |
| #4 | chrissiMZ | 8 | 0.0068 |
| #5 | x-ReFleX-x | 5 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BIGGEST GABE | 628 | 0.20 | 18 min |
| #2 | oilman | 616 | 0.15 | 19 min |
| #3 | Wolfgang Kupeeki | 260 | 0.08 | 10 min |
| #4 | chrissiMZ | 217 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| #5 | Naxx'Ril | 178 | 0.03 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nexinus | +2.98 | 75 | 44 |
| #2 | BIGGEST GABE | +2.55 | 78 | 66 |
| #3 | chrissiMZ | +2.05 | 56 | 57 |
| #4 | Nikil | +1.34 | 63 | 58 |
| #5 | oilman | +0.80 | 52 | 77 |





