








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 457 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 318 matches | ||
| Premier | 89 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 102 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2969 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,473 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2304 | 16% |
| Smokes | 4786 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 3985 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 3398 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,560,647 of utility $230 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 161 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gauchox | 53% | 210 |
| #2 | Maël «0x» Ratel ™ | 52% | 127 |
| #3 | XChaussette | 50% | 66 |
| #4 | Skunk | 50% | 66 |
| #5 | LazPiT | 49% | 166 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | ŠcraƁz | 48% | 299 |
| #8 | Abracadabroutch' | 48% | 178 |
| #9 | nRKK- [A] | 46% | 147 |
| #10 | Lpg | 45% | 187 |
| #11 | WaaX | xɐɐʍ | 44% | 126 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ŠcraƁz | 18 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | Abracadabroutch' | 8 | 0.0021 |
| #3 | WaaX | xɐɐʍ | 6 | 0.0022 |
| #4 | Lpg | 5 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | LazPiT | 5 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gauchox | 1016 | 0.23 | 29 min |
| #2 | ŠcraƁz | 661 | 0.11 | 14 min |
| #3 | Abracadabroutch' | 504 | 0.13 | 15 min |
| #4 | nRKK- [A] | 304 | 0.10 | 7 min |
| #5 | Lpg | 237 | 0.06 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Skunk | +3.99 | 80 | 63 |
| #2 | Gauchox | +1.76 | 47 | 80 |
| #3 | XChaussette | +1.41 | 64 | 44 |
| #4 | Lpg | +0.96 | 51 | 61 |
| #5 | nRKK- [A] | +0.90 | 63 | 70 |





