










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 346 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 444 matches | ||
| Premier | 106 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 24 matches | ||
| Faceit | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




99 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4832 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,672 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5725 | 39% |
| Smokes | 4379 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 3527 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1041 | 7% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,909,254 of utility $195 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 817 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Veko | 53% | 111 |
| #2 | OzRuK | 52% | 65 |
| #3 | sigmowich | 52% | 121 |
| #4 | kael | 51% | 559 |
| #5 | JOGOAT | 50% | 278 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kael | 289 | 0.0270 |
| #2 | JOGOAT | 40 | 0.0073 |
| #3 | Veko | 38 | 0.0188 |
| #4 | stay strapped | 33 | 0.0110 |
| #5 | sigmowich | 24 | 0.0105 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kael | 2022 | 0.19 | 24 min |
| #2 | sigmowich | 428 | 0.19 | 11 min |
| #3 | stay strapped | 199 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #4 | Veko | 163 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #5 | chatgpt owns us all | 152 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kael | +3.61 | 56 | 45 |
| #2 | chatgpt owns us all | +2.45 | 45 | 60 |
| #3 | OzRuK | +0.73 | 41 | 54 |
| #4 | Veko | +0.71 | 65 | 39 |
| #5 | stay strapped | +0.51 | 17 | 32 |





