








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 917 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 607 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 35 matches | ||
| Faceit | 25 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 66 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7134 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 31,632 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 12685 | 40% |
| Smokes | 6726 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 8019 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 4202 | 13% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,684,598 of utility $110 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 505 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Harman | 51% | 86 |
| #2 | Mixtaflex | 50% | 82 |
| #3 | Jack. | 49% | 479 |
| #4 | Bicatze | 47% | 191 |
| #5 | DZGNER | 47% | 204 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Harman | 51% | 86 |
| #2 | Mixtaflex | 50% | 82 |
| #3 | Jack. | 49% | 479 |
| #4 | Bicatze | 47% | 191 |
| #5 | DZGNER | 47% | 204 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jack. | 14 | 0.0013 |
| #2 | DZGNER | 8 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | Bicatze | 7 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | Harman | 4 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jack. | 1767 | 0.17 | 45 min |
| #2 | DZGNER | 661 | 0.15 | 19 min |
| #3 | Bicatze | 288 | 0.07 | 8 min |
| #4 | Harman | 228 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #5 | Mixtaflex | 108 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DZGNER | +0.30 | 57 | 81 |
| #2 | Clydee. | +0.22 | 61 | 72 |
| #3 | Jack. | +0.16 | 55 | 69 |
| #4 | Bicatze | -0.26 | 61 | 67 |
| #5 | Harman | -0.73 | 59 | 65 |





