








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 342 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 234 matches | ||
| Faceit | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 36 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1764 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,860 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1315 | 22% |
| Smokes | 1181 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 1935 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 1429 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,542,544 of utility $257 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 190 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Clydee. | 50% | 82 |
| #7 | DZGNER | 48% | 40 |
| #8 | b4nks | 46% | 48 |
| #9 | MinOu _* | 43% | 60 |
| #10 | Madclown | 14% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jack. | 9 | 0.0031 |
| #2 | Clydee. | 4 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | Bicatze | 3 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | Harman | 2 | 0.0041 |
| #5 | inFqm | 2 | 0.0057 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jack. | 597 | 0.21 | 15 min |
| #2 | Clydee. | 354 | 0.20 | 9 min |
| #3 | MinOu _* | 200 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| #4 | Bicatze | 166 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #5 | DZGNER | 154 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | b4nks | +1.84 | 33 | 58 |
| #2 | Jack. | +1.77 | 56 | 70 |
| #3 | DZGNER | +1.21 | 55 | 86 |
| #4 | Bicatze | +1.19 | 64 | 68 |
| #5 | Clydee. | +0.99 | 60 | 71 |





