








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 5 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 262 matches | ||
| Premier | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3465 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 22,100 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7472 | 34% |
| Smokes | 5731 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 3732 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 5165 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $479,861 of utility $56 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 50 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sasa2k | 57% | 115 |
| #2 | Permabann | 57% | 21 |
| #3 | Qgel die Q. | 57% | 30 |
| #4 | d$. | 56% | 25 |
| #5 | bqAass | 55% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Permabann | 57% | 21 |
| #3 | Qgel die Q. | 57% | 30 |
| #4 | d$. | 56% | 25 |
| #5 | bqAass | 55% | 22 |
| #6 | QooN | 41% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sasa2k | 385 | 0.15 | 8 min |
| #2 | QooN | 153 | 0.23 | 4 min |
| #3 | d$. | 80 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #4 | Permabann | 75 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #5 | bqAass | 69 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Qgel die Q. | +2.15 | 90 | 69 |
| #2 | d$. | +1.28 | 72 | 72 |
| #3 | QooN | +0.98 | 81 | 74 |
| #4 | Permabann | +0.35 | 81 | 66 |
| #5 | -Upssss- | +0.06 | 66 | 78 |





