








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1 achievement has been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 123 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 77 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3956 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,764 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5734 | 42% |
| Smokes | 2335 | 17% |
| HE Grenades | 3700 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 1995 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,023,372 of utility $100 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 229 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ☦Geo777☦ | 79% | 66 |
| #2 | TheDinkster | 78% | 46 |
| #3 | walts | 78% | 59 |
| #4 | Luke | 77% | 95 |
| #5 | VS | 73% | 60 |





