








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 87 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 90 matches | ||
| Premier | 9 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1293 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,172 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1495 | 24% |
| Smokes | 1513 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1878 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 1286 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $241,996 of utility $91 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 143 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | korniii | 59% | 54 |
| #2 | ^clm. Take it easy | 57% | 14 |
| #3 | Stepi | 54% | 57 |
| #4 | AandiiXX | 53% | 75 |
| #5 | Vollkornsprudel | 51% | 74 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Stepi | 54% | 57 |
| #4 | AandiiXX | 53% | 75 |
| #5 | Vollkornsprudel | 51% | 74 |
| #6 | ExorE | 51% | 45 |
| #7 | MAVER1CK-1 | 38% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AandiiXX | 5 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | korniii | 2 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | ExorE | 2 | 0.0019 |
| #4 | Vollkornsprudel | 1 | 0.0006 |
| #5 | Stepi | 1 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AandiiXX | 405 | 0.23 | 11 min |
| #2 | korniii | 184 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #3 | ExorE | 58 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #4 | Vollkornsprudel | 57 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| #5 | Stepi | 30 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AandiiXX | +1.34 | 71 | 82 |
| #2 | abchecken -.- | +0.83 | 56 | 78 |
| #3 | Vollkornsprudel | +0.80 | 50 | 67 |
| #4 | ^clm. Take it easy | +0.79 | 61 | 71 |
| #5 | korniii | -0.52 | 50 | 75 |





